I recently came back from a trip back to my hometown. It is the reason for the lapse in posts.
The trip got me thinking though. I was very glad to see the people but the trip managed to reaffirm my urge not to ever live there again. I am not a fan of my hometown. Add to that my relatively remote living situation and you could say the whole country seemed overwhelming. I immediately fell back into the pull of consumerism and the amount of money I could live on for 2 or 3 months here flew out of my pocket rapidly while I visited there. Some things were a planned investment; a new iPod and Rosetta Stone. Those were big expenditures but it was the lunches, dinners, coffees, and alcohol that added up quickly.
I also had a huge sinus reaction from the moment I got there. I was stuffed up and miserable because of it for a lot of the time. Yes I could have taken drugs while I was there to help. I tried a few things but drugs leave me hazy and disconnected and I wanted to be connected. For the most part I managed okay with the connection but my physical activity dropped to nearly nothing. I would go into sneezing jags when I was outside too long. I went on one short and very disappointing hike. That was my favorite thing about Phoenix in the Winter; hiking is tolerable.
I came to a conclusion while I was visiting. That I needed to only visit in the future. I do not want to move back. I am not sure that where I am is the permanent solution but it is most definitely a solution that works now. I can start looking again when I feel antsy.
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